“Ugh, it’s hot!”
Shane flopped back on Jesse’s bed. He rolled a semi-frozen water bottle back and forth on his forehead until little rivulets ran down his face and neck onto the comforter. Shane’s black hair was shiny from a few minutes before when he’d dumped his one other bottle over his head. It had also made his already thin tank stick to his skin in the most interesting ways. Jesse turned on the fan and faked a chuckle to hide the fact that Shane all wet and sprawled out on his bed made him think things that...oohhh, damn. Stop it, you ass. Say something!
"Yeah, you think?" he teased. "It's summer in Chicago. You're just being a wimp." Still, Jesse couldn't help it. He leaned over and ran his fingers down that damp tank top, dying to feel the skin underneath. But they were still new. Way too new for that kind of thing, right? Jesse still couldn’t believe that it had actually happened. That day a few weeks before when Shane had kissed him for the first time, when everything had changed between them, still felt like a fantasy. His most hidden favorite fantasy. But it was real. Impossibly, crazily real. Jesse was still waiting to wake up.
I want to touch him…He’d been wanting to touch Shane since they’d met back in high school. God, that felt like a lifetime ago. Far more than the two years it really was.
Shane reached up and pulled, tumbling Jesse down next to him. He rolled over and covered Jesse’s mouth in a sweet kiss. Jesse’s breathing sped up. He couldn't help it.
Even though he and Shane had been seeing each other as far more than friends for weeks, they’d been keeping their growing feelings away from the rest of the band. It was getting harder by the day. And even with their new, well, whatever it was, just between the two of them, Jesse still couldn’t get used to it. He couldn’t get used to Shane’s gorgeous mouth on his, used to hearing Shane tell him how much he liked him, used to the fact that beautiful, cool as hell Shane Ventura wanted to be with him—dorky, chubby, awkward him. Why?
“Jess?…Babe? What’s up?” Shane lifted his head and reached for Jesse’s hand, threading their fingers together.
“Nothing. I just—”
“Listen, Jess.” Oh, God he’s gonna break up with me. I knew this was too good to be true. He’s gonna— “I wanna tell the guys.”
Jesse choked. “What?”
“They’re not completely mental—well, I guess my brother is. But they have to know something is up. I can barely keep my hands off you during rehearsal. I don’t like this secrecy shit.”
Jesse’s already hot face turned beet red. He could feel it. He buried it in the comforter. What would the guys think? They’d tell Shane he was nuts for going after someone as lame as Jesse. Shane had boys all over him constantly…well, except for lately. Oh, Jesus, the band probably has noticed...
“What?” Shane chuckled. “I don’t care who knows, babe. It sucks not being able to be near you like I want to just ’cause Dre or Nicky might be watching. You hafta know I wanna kiss you, like, all the damn time.”
“Why?” Jesse wasn’t fishing for compliments. He really didn’t understand.
“You actually mean that?”
Jesse nodded his head miserably. Shane lifted his chin. “Because you’re smart, and funny, and I can’t even hear a single note you sing without getting all turned on…and, well, because I’m falling for you. Like, hard.” Shane’s forehead wrinkled, his eyes went puppy-dog droopy. “Don’t you feel the same way about me?”
Shane’s sudden insecurity was sweet and sad and so very endearing. “Of course I do. But you’re Shane. I’m just…” A nerd. Ugly, squishy, pale, and too damn blind to get rid of these dumb ass glasses.
“There is no ‘just’ anything. Jess, you’re my boyfriend. Right? I never asked officially but I was hoping…”
Jesse nodded. He didn’t even try to conceal his slow smile. “And you really don’t care that I’m not hot like you?”
He snuggled up to Shane experimentally. Other than their very first ‘I can’t believe it’s happening and holy crap it’s so crazy good’ kiss, Jesse had never instigated any of their physical encounters. He’d always been afraid that the perfect fantasy he’d been living in would disappear and Shane would push him away. Didn’t happen. Shane wrapped damp arms around Jesse’s shoulders and kissed him hard.
“You’re perfect. Quit saying that shit.”
“Nicky doesn’t think so.”
Shane snorted. “My brother’s an asshole. He doesn’t see what I see. And if he did, I’d have to kick his ass.”
“Or wax his nuts.” Jesse giggled.
Shane sighed. “I’m never telling anyone I did that again.”
“What? It’s funny!”
“I was in high school.”
“Oooooh, and now that you’re mister big man at twenty you’re so much more mature?” Jesse rolled his eyes at Shane.
“You know what?” Shane chuckled and pushed Jesse back against the mattress. He laughed and poked until Jesse was giggling and almost gasping for breath. Jesse tried to tickle him back, but Shane was too quick and he squirmed out of Jesse’s grasp and pounced again.
“Ouch, you win! I can’t breathe.” Jesse gave up quickly. He was ready for more kissing—not so easy when he was trying to drag air into his lungs.
Shane raised his eyebrows. “So, no more shit about what you think you look like?”
Jesse hesitated. “Yeah, but I’m still not sure we should tell the guys. Bandmates aren’t supposed to date each other. It’s bad rock ’n’ roll karma or something.”
Shane rolled his eyes. “They’re gonna figure it out. I refuse to act like we’re not together for the rest of our lives.” The rest of our… Jesse choked but he hugged Shane closer. Shane’s voice was soft in his ear. “Babe, I’m sorry if that freaked you out, but it’s how I feel. I’m in—”
Jesse wasn’t ready to hear any more. He wanted to but it was just too much too soon. He’d always figured he would end up alone. To go from that to ‘the rest of our lives’ was a bit overwhelming. He dove into Shane’s lips, kissing him aggressively, completely, deeply, for the first time.
Shane moaned against his mouth. “I’ve been waiting for you to do that.”
“What?” Jesse could hardly breathe.
“Just fuckin’…kiss me. I’m never sure you want it like I do.”
“I do. Always.” Jesse couldn’t believe that Shane would be unsure of anyone, let alone someone like him.
“C’mere, Jess. Kiss me again.”
So he did. He wrapped his hand around Shane’s neck, fingers delving into the damp silky strands of his hair, and yanked Shane’s face to his. The kiss was different than most of their kisses had been before. Where there had been sweetness there was heat, soft touches were replaced by grasping desperate hands. Tongues swirled and Jesse fisted his hand in Shane’s hair. He pulled—and not very gently.
Shane moaned and tossed his thigh over Jesse’s hip. “Jess…”
Jesse moaned in return. He couldn’t believe how good it felt. In a moment of boldness, he ran his hands down Shane’s back and cupped his ass through baggy jeans. Shane tilted his hips closer to Jesse’s and deepened their kiss. He moved to his belt and fumbled with it for a moment before his jeans went loose under Jesse’s hand.
Yes. I want to. His heart crashed—pound, pound, pound, pound—against his ribs. Jesse slipped his hand inside jeans and boxers until he was caressing the warm bare skin of Shane’s perfect butt. Shane shivered hard and his back bowed, bringing his hips down on Jesse’s. His mouth, that beautiful mouth, suctioned itself to Jesse’s neck and Jesse shivered in return.
“Aw, fuck babe. I wanna touch you, too,” Shane breathed.
Jesse froze, trembling.
Shane couldn’t believe how fucking turned on he was, just from one little damn kiss. But he should’ve believed it because it was like that every single time he and Jesse kissed. At the beginning he’d been nervous. He didn’t want to ruin the most important friendship he’d ever had, but with each kiss he wanted more, with every touch he knew he’d never be able to stop.
He was in love with his best friend and it was new and scary and perfect and so fucking beautiful that half the time he felt like he was just going to take off flying at any moment.
“Jess, what’s wrong? You don’t want me to touch you?” Please say it's okay. I'm dying…
“I just thought you wouldn’t want to…because, well, you know.”
Shane slipped his hands beneath Jesse’s T-shirt, wedging them between Jesse’s back and the bed. Jesse arched to give him more room. The skin on his back was smooth and a little damp from the heat. Shane wanted more. He had to feel more.
“Jess, do you have any idea how sexy you are right now?” And he was. His spiky hair was all askew, glasses long lost to the carpet, those big gray eyes were shining up at Shane and his mouth was parted and wet, begging for more kisses. Shane wanted to show Jesse everything. Wanted to be his first. “I want whatever is okay with you.”
Ah, shit, he’s nervous. He never stutters like that anymore.
“It’s okay. Only if you want to. We can just kiss.” Shane ran his fingers through Jesse’s silky spikes and kissed him again, soft and romantic like they usually did.
“N-no. I want you to do it. I do.” With trembling hands, Jesse unbuttoned his cargo shorts and loosened the zipper. Shane couldn’t help grinning at him. He’d wanted to touch Jesse for so long. Shane lowered his head to kiss Jesse again, slow and deep, sexual, hot. Jesse shook against him and arched up instinctively.
“Yeah, like that, babe.” Shane slipped his hands into Jesse’s shorts and shuddered when he finally got a hold of Jesse’s bare, and surprisingly muscular ass. Yes, yes, yes. They were kissing and grabbing and touching and it felt like nothing Shane had ever done before, even though he thought he’d done it all.
“Shane,” Jesse whispered. Just his name. But the longing and desire in that one word turned him inside out.
“What do you need, baby? Let me do it.”
Jesse buried his face in the crook of Shane’s neck. Then he took one of Shane’s suddenly trembling hands and curled it around his sizable erection. Damn. Shane hadn’t been expecting that. But it was nice. More than nice.
“Please,” was all Jesse said. “Touch me.”
Oh, hell yeah! Shane thought it would be months before they were anywhere near where his hand currently was but he wasn’t questioning the gift. He captured Jesse’s mouth with his and started stroking, slow and firm, until he figured out how Jesse liked it best.
“Sh-Shane?” Jesse was shaking, his face pink around summer freckles.
“You okay, babe?” Shane slowed his stroking. Jesse nodded and gulped. “Want more?”
“Yeah. More. It feels so good.”
“Lift your hips up,” Shane whispered. Then he dragged Jesse’s shorts down to his thighs until his deliciously thick erection popped free.
“What are you doing, Shane?” Jesse’s voice was reduced to a whisper.
“Shhh.” Shane grinned. “You’ll like it.”
Then he lowered his head and took his first long taste of Jesse’s pretty pink cock. God, it felt good against his tongue. Shane slid down slowly until he had all of Jesse in his mouth, nudging against his throat. Jesse gasped and arched from the bed. His hand reflexively came to land on Shane’s shoulder and he squeezed hard. Shane wanted to smile, but he couldn’t stand to stop what he was doing. It was everything he’d fantasized about late at night when he was alone, thinking of the way Jesse kissed, or that sideways smile he’d get when Shane had said something dumb. Shane couldn’t have fantasized the way Jesse’s little grunts of pleasure got higher when he was excited, couldn’t have imagined his salty taste, or that warm hand on Shane’s shoulder telling him not to ever, ever stop.
Shane sucked hard, pulling up until he released Jesse with a pop. His mouth was replaced by his hand, squeezing, stroking, feeling. It was all way too perfect.
“Feel good?” he asked. He didn’t give Jesse much of a chance to reply before they were kissing again. Jesse moaned, desperate and sweet, against his lips. Shane could feel him tremble, feel the surge in the hard shaft beneath his palm. Jesse was so close but he was fighting it.
“I know, baby. Let it happen. Just…let go.”
Didn’t take long. Jesse convulsed, mouth open in a silent scream and Shane’s hand was filled with warm wetness. He didn’t even look down. All he could do was stare at Jesse’s face and stroke softly, watching the shivers, reveling in Jesse’s reaction.
“Jess, you feel so good. I…” He didn’t know what to say. There was too much in his head, not enough, so much more than he’d ever imagined saying to anyone, let alone his sweet, awkward best friend with the surprising spine of steel.
Jesse had his face buried in Shane’s neck again. Shane wasn’t going to let him hide.
“What is it? Jesse?”
“Nothing, I’m just…embarrassed, I guess.”
“Why? Didn’t it feel good?” Jesse snorted into Shane’s neck. Shane lifted his head by his chin.
“Yes, okay? Of course it felt good. Better than good. I just…fuck…like a damn twelve year old.”
“And you’re embarrassed about that?” Shane chuckled and pulled him close. “I’d have been worried if you didn’t lose control. Jess, what do you think would happen if you touched me?” Jesse looked up at him with wide eyes and Shane nodded. “Off like a rocket. Ten seconds flat.”
“Shane, I—” Shane knew what Jesse was thinking. He could see it right there in those beautiful gray eyes. But it was hard to say. Scary as goddamned hell, too. He let Jesse off the hook.
“I know, babe. Me too.”
Be sure to check out Moonlight Becomes You, coming from Loose Id on August 9th! And be on the lookout for the last Shane and Jesse short, For Real, which will be posted on Friday. A collective PDF of all three stories will also be uploaded to Goodreads that day and available for free download.